There’s a few people after I did the 45 Things post that kind of went “You’re an atheist?! Since when?”. And whilst I can’t put an exact date on when, I can explain why.
I grew up in a partly Christian home, we didn’t go to church but my mum believes in God, we always had a bible in the house and a crucifix on the wall. I went to a normal state school – however that meant I was still taught about Jesus and the bible, especially at Christmas and Easter. We also said the lords prayer every morning in assembly and song probably 3-4 hymns too.
Now I’m older, I think this is wrong. It’s not wrong that children are taught about the Bible and Christianity, however it is wrong that it’s the only belief system taught in a school and that it’s spoon fed to children like that. I feel that as a child I was familiarised with one religion, this meaning it’s the one that feels most comfortable for me and “right”.
I’ve also done the whole accepting Jesus thing and in all honesty, for the most part I really enjoyed being a Christian, getting baptised, being part of a church and having some great people around me.
I’ve been the complete opposite too a radical atheist – debating with Christians all the time, angry with God. Not entirely healthy I can tell you – but at the same time, it taught me a lot.
I’m not going to lie – in my time being a Christian, I’ve had some things happen to me that I can’t explain. Maybe they were God, I don’t know. And I suppose in a way, they are – or should I say, could be a point towards saying yes = God exists.
My whole problem really is that – I’ve had some really horrible, nasty things happen in my life – resulting in me having some pretty nasty mental problems (depression, anxiety, OCD and that kind of thing) and I cannot for the life of me understand why a loving, caring, good, just God can just leave me and not help me in that situation. This also extends to the bible and other situations around the world – God lets so many bad things happen, God has also done some pretty bad things. This is the reason, I’m no longer a Christian – don’t get me wrong, I have an open mind about it – I have some great Christian friends as well – but I cannot bring myself to follow a God that isn’t 100% good, loving, just as he claims to be.
This issue is so very complex – maybe I’ll go into this more in another post but now you know the main why I’m an atheist.
Thoughts? Leave a comment.